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Relations in the New Age

Written by Ronald Jan

Songs, stories, novels, music… a great many of them deal with the aspects of love. Sometimes documenting an inspiring love-story, but perhaps more often detailing its failure. No matter what the outcome may be, these are all dealing with the drama that seems to naturally come along in the process of love. Captivating us enormously, it rules great parts of our life. So what does the Age of Aquarius signify for our relationships?

Our point of view of love is personal, and has everything to do with our vision of life: what does it mean to live, and what is its purpose? Furthermore, what is the importance of love and the place it takes up within a relationship? What matters greatly is that our vision of life is strongly related to our vision of death. If you think that death is the end of it all, your vision of life will be fundamentally different compared to when you are convinced that this life, and the life after death, are a further step in a spiritual evolution. From its vantage point the soul offers an answer: the purpose of life is to transform ignorance into insight. The path of life enables us to learn certain lessons. Attaining this consciousness has to do with the path from the personality to the soul; during this process we gradually make our personalities more transparent, so that the light of our soul can become ever more attuned with our consciousness, till it can freely shine outward. A person becoming themSelf: a cosmic being.

From the soul level we know that we feel the need for unity, of connection with everything around us. Benjamin Creme describes it thus: ‘The essence of being is ‘wholeness’, total unity, the joining together of Father-Mother-God. That is the natural state of man and woman. As people have lost this sense of unity on a physical level, they are continuously searching for it. This desire for unity is the same as the desire for unity on the highest spiritual level, but is only related to the physical level. It ensures the survival of the species, and that is essential.’

We are on our way towards a greater consciousness. Some are further developed in this process than others (see, for instance, the list of historical persons and their stage of evolution, appendix G). In this journey – from personality to the soul – we experience an ever broader reality as we get closer to our Self. If life is the learning of lessons, then the same vision would apply to relationships. A relationship can be both confronting (mirror) as well as inspiring, stimulating you in both instances to get to work on yourself.

‘Love’ from the personality

The attitudes towards love we encounter in daily life are, however, very different. In the media, on television, and especially in gossip magazines we are fed a rather oversimplified, sentimental and romantic image of what love is, and how to maintain it in a relationship. To put it crassly: it portrays relationships as they are experienced by the personality. This is a vision in which the other has to make us happy and complete, and in which love is a barter system, as in I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine.

The personality, aka the ego, thinks in terms of separation: the I and the other. The ego is tied to the body, and therefore prioritises sensual experiences: food, sex, to look at and hold things of beauty, etcetera. The ego is also tied to the emotional body, and wants to be confirmed at all times, wants to make a deal out of anything, wants to be in the right, fights to ward his body, and considers competition, status and power of extreme importance, causing quarrels and power games to be the order of the day. The ego generally also harbours our fears, which it fondly projects outward.

The ego does not have clearly delineated morals or principles either. Once a principle has been trespassed against, the other has to make amends; generally the incident will not be forgotten ever. Forgiveness is apparently not part of the deal. A person in separation can easily judge, feel superior and pose demands.

Love from the soul

The other extreme in this spectrum is the soul. The soul knows no separation, but rather experience connectedness: the other is just like me, he is just ‘an other I’. The soul knows no struggle, and experiences only the path of development. The soul does not think in terms of property or ownership, but in the respect for the other, and through that in letting go (of the other) and unconditionally so. The soul can see the other as they are, and see how far it has come in the process from the personality to the soul. The soul knows what true love is; ‘the total, unconditional love, that flows from the heart of the unified human being that does not ask for love in return’ (Creme).

The broader view of the soul slowly unveils – within our earthly limitations – the true nature: love is insight. The seeing, the insight, and the experience of the connection, that is love. It is the attracting forces of love that hold everything together: the atoms, the stars and the planets, nature, the people. This ultimately broad insight causes the constant flow from the heart. In that order.

Experiencing this deep connectedness is love. Needless to say this is not judgemental or hampered by prejudice. Whether you like something or not, or whether someone is your type, or not, has nothing to do with it. It is free of formal constraints, as it is the world of energy and consciousness. The soul does not judge, because the soul does not have morals or principles. Things are as they come. Which is not to say that the soul condones everything, or that everything can do. What is also important to realise: it is often the case that the things the personality gets excited about, are of no interest to the soul.

The road inside

This future may therefore sound a little less romantic and exiting, but is nevertheless the reality that we as human beings are developing ourselves toward. This process – from the personality to the soul – equates ‘the road inside’. The most important relationship is therefore the relationship with ourself. We can see the other ever more clearly, and learn to understand them, as we gain more insight into ourSelf. During that process we become aware of an ever broadening reality, and a growth of consciousness occurs.

Within relationships there are many different points of view in the spectrum between the two extremes, the personality vs. the soul. This is probably the main reason that so many different things are written about love and relationships. Depending upon our level of consciousness we add colour and content to our relationships. Often we enter into a relationship from the stance of the personality: the first things that attract you are generally physical and/or emotional. Yet a human being is – as described in appendix D – much more than just a physical and emotional body. We will slowly discover that a relationship should connect on more than just those two levels. A relationship with a partner who has a totally different view of life, can, for instance, rapidly lead to difficulties.

Five pointed star

In the New Age we will spiritually grow ever more towards the ‘ideal’ of the five pointed star of human relationships. Through the discovery of the soul and our consciousness, we will become familiar with our spiritual blueprint, and the five levels on which we can resonate as partners: soul, personality, and the mental, astral, and physical body. Either through similarities in this five pointed star, or through the way in which we differ yet complete each other, we may find a partner that connects well with us. That is, through our way of being, our view on questions of life and death, our values and norms, lifestyles, interests, ways of thinking, emotional condition and physical attraction. What else would you want? In such a case the relationship itself will no longer be the goal, but rather what we – together or individually – would want to realise and establish for a better world.

From this description you can readily conclude that the concept of the ‘twin soul’ is a myth, as there is more than one person that you can successfully team up with. Still, experiences from former lives and karma could, of course, mean that something has to be resolved with someone. The law of Karma ensures that you will run into each other again. According to Creme nine out of ten relationships are karma related.

‘Old’ romantic world views

The myth of the twin soul actually derives from a romantic world view, inspired by the sixth beam of idealism. According to Creme this cosmic beam was at the height of its influence between the 10th and the 17th century, exactly during the time that romantic love flourished and bloomed. Before those days no such thing existed, and in the Age of Aquarius romantic love, which keeps the illusion of the stereotypical roles of men and women roles intact, an astral imagination, will more and more be replaced by a love of a different nature. This will be essential, as sticking to an idealised role will make it impossible for us to grow.

In retrospect we will have a different perspective, not just on romance, but on sexuality as well. Our times will be seen, as ‘those days when sexuality was all over the place’, the sexual revolution in the sixties of the last century having been widespread and thorough. Taboos had to be vanquished! Yet it would also draw your attention in that same retrospect that for a woman to be labelled as ‘sexy’, was one of the highest qualifications available. A time in which jealousy was seen as a sign of love for another, in stead of a nuisance of the personality. Most of all, being in love was confused with love.

Infatuation is indeed the vehicle of the personality. The saying should therefore not be that love makes blind, as it is rather the infatuation that does so. Nothing wrong with being in love, but a wise counsellor it is not. Once the true insight hits the spot, the tension vaporises, the electromagnetic attraction fades, and with it so does the ‘feeling’ of being in love (or rather ‘the emotion’). That is why relationships based on the needs of the physical and emotional body are often transitory in nature.

The road we take from the personality to the soul, makes us become more ‘real’, and at the same time more detached. The higher the energy of the electromagnetic interchange, the more we experience that we are one with each other, and ultimately with everyone. The future of the Age of Aquarius is that of the way of the heart, the spiritual equivalent of the soul: to speak and act from the heart, to feel what is true and what is right to do. This way we nurture ourselves, through the interchange of our intuition (of the soul) and reality: to know, to feel, to fathom and to apply … and then to detach yourself and gain closure. That is how we create growth of consciousness.

In the Age of Pisces Jesus explained to us what love is. As logical sequel we will learn to truly grasp that in the Age of Aquarius. The past two thousand years we have, so to speak, been staring at the waves of the incoming tide. We considered it spectacular, and we were fully engulfed by it. Now we are finding out that those breaking waves are but a tiny particle of the entire sea, and that what matters most is the ocean beyond the surf: the depth, the immensity. There is still so much to discover.

About the author

Ronald Jan

Already for long Ronald Jan Heijn was interested in a broader way of thinking. His life went through the swamp areas of the big theme’s of this society. His obstacles, valleys and opponents became his best teachers. Through his experience in society on the one site and his ‘being a student of the broader mind’ on the other, he always tried to build bridges. Also his studies (in the eighties) of Business Administration and Cultural Antropology carried this wish and content. Ronald Jan followed many spiritual courses and read many spiritual books (esp. Ageless Wisdom). In the Netherlands Ronald Jan is known from the Dutch grocery store family Albert Heijn and used to be a top level hockey player for the Dutch national team. In 1987 his father was abducted and killed, the man responsible was later forgiven by him. To further a better world he started the largest holistic centre of the Netherlands, Oibibio in Amsterdam. After eight years Oibibio succumbed to its own success. Many let downs later Ronald Jan met Harry Beckers (HB). Together they gave lectures and released a documentary on a broader way of thinking, consciousness and the afterlife. Unaware at the time, Ronald Jan was educated to become a messenger of the New Age during that period. Most of all he got to witness the severe road of preparation of the World Renewer HB and to ultimately cooperating in his coming forward.

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